The Faux Pas Press #163: Under the Pi of Heaven

The Faux Pas Press #163

Under the Pi of Heaven

By Chambo Fresh

There are moments in my life that are inexplicable. I'm sure if it is the world that needs me or Chambo that needs it. Messengers appear at every turn, those I've shunned before, those who seem to have infinite patience for me and my antics. Sure, it is fun to sit on a throne of self-righteousness, pointing out flaw after flaw of those in the world. But things could always be worse and I have so much. Messages seem to reflect off of matter, bouncing in every direction, landing perfectly into my path with so much meaning and pertinence. I don't get it. I guess there must be a readiness in the heart. I can tell you that my pineal gland is active - just about as active as a prayerful mind can get. Calling on help, receiving help and then forgetting that I got it, and then apologizing. I don't know how long this cycle will continue. For the rest of my days perhaps.

A grid is plotted, even just close enough to a destination, when we think thought and speak words. But there are so many jewels to gather along the way. Maybe there is not enough room for them because of the worthless rocks we carry in our pack. Our grid is plotted close enough to our intention for us to feel the fabric of our dreams. Close to this plotted point must also be a readiness to accept the full consequences of our past acts. The kicker for me - the thing that keeps me away from that exact grid - I don't want to take on the responsibility for the well-being of others at the same time. I feel that this is the nature of healing though. I mean, just to make a casual apology seems like a good enough start for me. But I don't think is. A true and relentless change in attitude, however, can do wonders to make up for past unkindness. I pay my debts when I owe - I do this as soon as I am able without justifying a thing. Can we swallow that pill? Our irreconcilable pride? The first overture to the symphony of your conscious life, the first terrain feature recognizable to a dreamed intention is reconciliation. More belongings will not suffice.

Divine help is needed to make direct amends sometimes. I've learned this the hard way and am still going through it. But I can see the grid points on the map, all those intentions placed out there for renewed vigor. Unloading our guilt and admitting our mistakes sometimes does the trick. Other times, we have to use our creativity. I don't feel that we can really make restitution without developing some care, some real concern about others. I am not talking about an unhealthy co-dependence, the chains of emotional torture that others hold. Changing my behavior. An awareness, a consciousness for others - to care and then apologize if need be. Doing this brings down a symphony of perfect into our lives. Pi - the perfect number moving into infinite space.