The Faux Pas Press #126
Your Kickass Life
By Jason Fresh
07 January 2012
I promise I won't plug the glorious campaign of Mr. President, Ron "motherfucking" Paul, in this post. (Wasted vote my ass!) Yesterday, I saw lots of hamburgers being flipped on a grill at a place called Five Guys – probably the best bacon cheeseburger I’ve had in a while. I ate mine outside in the car next to a Trader Joe’s Store and wondered if I should change my diet. I determined that my diet is not a problem in this life – not those greasy, juicy patty fucking cheeseburgers. No, they are not a problem. I realized that I have no real problems in my life. Even my hereditary gene traits mimicking a lesser-evolved strain in the family line or my survival skills malfunctioning in moments of need, perhaps making me look like a jackass – these are not problems. These are opportunities. So, next time you are eating a fluffy, diabolical little cupcake from Suzie Cakes over in Newport, next time you pay penance to some dead deity for enjoying the shit that makes life worthwhile, say, “No. These are not problems. These are opportunities, opportunities to enjoy the life I am writing in this science fiction novel called My Kickass Life. Even if I did inherit the ugliness of Shadrach Roundy in my family tree - is there any better way to live a life than to overcome that shit?" Problems are opportunities to either indulge or conquer. Congrats on your kickass life.
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